I no longer know what my body needs or feels
I watch it drift along city boulevards,
vulnerable to the warmth emanating from strangers,
aching for a connection
left behind.
I play with images from the past,
like a child melting icecubes on his tongue,
and I wonder if my body
remembers lost loves differently than I do.
I watch my body compose itself
in front of others,
trying not to unravel,
and let tears stream down its face
for all that is lost
simply by being alive.
And when my aging friend
returns to me,
I tenderly embrace him,
and thank him for his energy
and persistence,
wishing that I could do more
to repay the gift.
{ 2 } Comments
I am impressed by the poem’s imagery.. The child melting icecubes, the concept of distance from one’s body. I also like the abstract insight (as opposed to an evoked image) contained in the line “all that is lost simply by being alive.” The final stanza I’m not sure what I want from it. At first I thought “aging friend” was just a mysterious character, but then I think I realized it’s the character’s body. And it think I want you to maintain the poem’s distance between the protagonist and the body. But then I think that I perhaps like the conclusion of the poem allowing the body to melt back with the soul, but I think I would end with more tension. Something that I thought could maintain the tension between the body and the soul would be to change the first line to “I want my aging friend/returned to me”. I don’t know…it’s just what I’m thinking right now about that last stanza.
christian, would you be willing to publish this on W5RAn? it’s strong and beautiful.
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